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string orchestra & stuck in the mud

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15th October 2015, Thu | 05:39 pm

(literally all I have to talk about these days is how the strings piece is progressing, and how totally busy/fail I feel in general... so let's see, what else.)

I had a major case of that bad-dream-puts-you-in-bad-mood thing this morning, sheesh!  I don't quite remember what it was about, something with (haha) being at some big event and not wanting to be/feeling ill/having to get stuff done, plus it was really sad too for some reason.  I was just exhausted by the time I was awake! 

And yesterday and day before I did q. a bit of baking -- just cake/bread/cookies and not taking ages on anything fancy so that was quite nice.

I actually really do like the middle of the week when I have potentially almost three solid days and can literally stay here and see no one and get on with stuff....  (or, as has happened in weeks gone by, decided that I need suddenly to: learn ao3 skin coding / tidy EVERYTHING / rediscover warcraft III or shareware games from my childhood...........)

Today so far been working on the score and logic audio mock up of the second part of this strings thing (same one as last term -- only the second movement really, so far, sadly.  It is kinda maybe twice as long as it was though!)  And, um, now I'm half thinking it's all rubbish again and I really don't want it to be because arghh this is all I have to show for myself and I need to show my tutor!!  so I don't want it to be rubbish!  (By even my own definition, I mean.)  


Hm, but this was meant to be a fairly positive turn of events, point being I have 8m30 / 10 pages / 150+ bars of something, and I was able to work on it.  (It's nearly half term and I haven't had a meeting yet -- this is my worry.)


Not sure how to think clearly and identify / actually work on the things in music ...... that, and/or to get back to that mythic state where I just wrote music without stopping to overthink all the time.  I think that did used to happen and I'm not just being nostalgic!

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